Sherlinka Naidoo

We all face trauma and moments of adversity in life. Each event may impact individuals differently, creating a unique surge of strong emotions, thoughts, and feelings of uncertainty. Resilience is the process of adapting well in the face of adversity, trauma, or significant sources of stress—such as family conflict, relationship instability, serious health challenges, or workplace and financial stressors. In summary, resilience is our ability to cope with stress in an effective and positive way.

Being able to nurture and cultivate resilience as a skill can be a core component of any therapeutic process. When we learn to become resilient, we learn to embrace the beautifully broad spectrum of the human experience.

To increase our capacity for resilience to endure—and grow from—our difficulties, here are a couple of things you can do daily.

Foster a Wellness Routine

Take care of your body. A buzzword at the moment is ‘self-care’ and it is important to remember that it has a role to play in our mental health and building resilience. That is because stress is just as much physical as it is emotional. Promoting and integrating positive lifestyle choices such as proper nutrition, sleep, hydration, and regular exercise can strengthen how our bodies adapt to stress and reduce the toll of emotions such as anxiety or depression. Exercise does not have to be strenuous and can be a daily walk with the dogs or a structured gym program.

Avoid Negative Outlets

At times it can be very tempting to mask our pain with alcohol, drugs, or other substances, but that is like putting a plaster on a deep laceration. It may require deep and emotional work to establish healthier outlets.

Accept Change

Accepting that change is a part of life is challenging. Specific goals may no longer be as attainable due to an adverse situation. Accepting situations that cannot be changed or altered can help us refocus on situations or things within our control.

Lean on Your Social Network

Nurture your connections and prioritise your relationships within your support system. When we connect with empathetic people, we can feel understood and grounded by positive social interactions. Establishing a support network can take time, and it may need to be a continuous process to ensure that our support network is compassionate. Compassionate individuals can validate our feelings where appropriate, further supporting the skill of resilience. The emotional distress of a traumatic event may often lead people to isolate themselves, but it is important to try to remain open to assistance and support from those who care about you. Whether you go on a weekly quiz date night with your partner or plan a brunch with friends, try to prioritise meaningful time spent genuinely connecting with people who care about you. Friends and family can be very important buffers against stress.

Seek Help

Finding help when you need it is crucial in building resilience. All people tend to be comfortable with different styles of interaction, and this may influence your choice of therapist. The cardinal “rule” when choosing a psychologist is that you should feel safe and at ease with your chosen mental health professional. You are not alone on the journey, and you may not be able to control all of your circumstances. For many of us, we can use our own resources, and the kinds of strategies listed above may be enough for nurturing resilience. However, at times, an individual may require more support when trying to make progress on the road to building resilience. A registered counsellor or psychologist can support you in developing an effective and personalised strategy for moving forward and building your resilience.

It is beneficial to remember that life is dynamic, constantly changing, and can be filled with challenges—all of which impact our mental health. Resilience can be used as one of the many buffers in protecting our mental health. Although adverse events can be painful and difficult, they don’t have to determine the outcome of our lives.